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Lady…

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One day an Irishman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself.  As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.



Suddenly, emerging from the surf comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba…

A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened

to her prayers which ended by saying, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and good-bye Grandpa."



The father asked, 'Why did you say good-bye Grandpa?'



The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, it just seemed…

A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the…

An attractive blonde from Cork , Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand dollars in a single roll of the dice.



She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." with that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new…

A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to "enforce the laws pending." He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, "Looks like you've had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?"



The hunter shrugged and handed the ducks to the warden. The warden took one of the ducks, inserted his finger into the duck's rectum, pulled it out, sn…

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the Garage,

Not a creature was stirring – not even the Dodge.…

So the world is supposed to be ending today?

That's sad. I never found out who let the dogs out,

the way to get to Sesame Street,

why Dora doesn't just use Google maps,

why we don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery",

why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed,

why "abbreviated" is such a long word,

why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons,…

Have you ever wondered who first uttered the phrase "You Gotta Be Shittin' Me?"

Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of Our country, way back when George Washington was crossing the Delaware river with his troops.



There were 33 (remember this number) in Washington 's boat. It was extremely dark and storming furiously and…